Category / reflection

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A Little Exhausted: Self-Care Struggles

So I haven't updated for a couple of weeks, in part because I've been really busy planning for upcoming… View More

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In Flames

So, I went to Burning Man. Learned some things about myself. -I don't actually need to see the Man burn. More important to come early to help out, and then leave without a massive line. Also, I really like having a stop to rest rather than driving straight home. -I'm a lot more fit than I expect. Biking did not provide any issues for me except for that the seat hurt my tailbone. -I am not in fact frigid, like I sometimes… View More

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parallelogram

wegotism (no 'u' in moving on... but there is in 'future'...) (2003) you say i mirror your interior, the things you hide behind your eyes you tell me that you want to reach in the looking glass it's hard to piece back together a past when it's been smashed stained colors and made beautiful, worshiped like a church and i think you're still… View More

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Spanksgiving! And a lot of serious stuff too.

Trigger warning: Abuse, mention of roots of Thanksgiving I tend to be fairly good at finding things to be grateful for every day, so in some… View More

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Stage 5: Acceptance

Trigger Warning: This discusses abuse, why someone would stay in an abusive situation, self-blame, loss of friends. It's part of a series about losing… View More

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Keeping Calm.

I had expected that going to London was going to be somewhat difficult. It had been years since I last visited, after all, and when I… View More

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Verbal Vulnerability

It's been a little while since I've last updated this blog. I'm hoping to write more regularly in 2014, but I've found it strange how the… View More

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Thirty Things I've Learned in my Twenties

So, I'm thirty now, which conceivably makes me more of a Proper Adult than being in my twenties. I certainly feel under more pressure to behave like an Adult, to have Real Furniture and be… View More

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Fat, Fit, and the Struggle In Between

I'm usually fairly secure in my fat body. Most days I love my round tummy, and my stretch-marked breasts, and my thick thighs, and even my jiggly upper arms. I perform in pornography, have… View More

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Packing for the Feminist Porn Awards and Conference

Thanks to the incredible generosity of a particular secret sponsor (who will simply be named Pornbot) I'm going to be heading out to my very first… View More