Category / advice

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Ask Me Ask Me Ask Me

I get asked in person all the time for advice relating to sex, gender, sex work, kink, consent... basically alternative sexuality. There's not a lot of good information for a pervert traversing the world of social mores on the sexier… View More

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13 Awesome Fetishes You May Not Know (And How to Try Them)

Trigger Warning: There is stuff on this list that could squick you out, or trigger you in some deep dark places. That's part of why people like these things, but also why it might be hard to read- clowns, dentistry, ageplay, these things stir up some crazy feelings and thoughts in us, visceral reactions. Some people like to play with that, others steer clear- either decision is a-ok!  I was on Facebook,… View More

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Resolved.

New Years Resolutions are one of those things that I have tended to do for years and years. It's interesting when you write down your resolutions online, because you can go back through the… View More

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Thirty Things I've Learned in my Twenties

So, I'm thirty now, which conceivably makes me more of a Proper Adult than being in my twenties. I certainly feel under more pressure to behave like an Adult, to have Real Furniture and be… View More

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Learning to Femme: Makeup Tutorials Even I Can Follow

I wasn't really brought up with makeup. I mean, I liked it, in theory, but other than multiple flavours of Lip Smackers, I never really played with… View More

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So Someone You Love is Suicidal: A Guide

'Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears.… View More

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Working Hard at Relaxing

I just got back from a mini vacation near Guerneville. A quaint cabin in the woods, even, complete with a hot tub, a grill, and a murder shed in the backyard. It was easier than I expected to not spend the… View More

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Aquatic Erotic: A Sex in Water Guide

Sex on the beach sounds great in romance novels or depicted in From here to eternity, but sand in your nether regions can make for a more abrasive reality. Still, watery lust… View More

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Analyze This! Questions Posed Via Google Searches

I get a lot of interesting searches that lead to my blog, some of which ask questions, some of which seek advice. While some of these are really silly,… View More

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How Not To Throw an Orgy: A 5 Point Guide

I thoroughly enjoy going to group sex events, and have ever since I was an 18 year old baby queer. I started with kink community events in a private dungeon in Boston, then costumed house… View More