Category / assumptions

Post 1 to 10 of 17

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Butch/Femme

So I've promised this entry for a little while and never quite gotten around to it. This could be in part because it's so confusing for me that I don't know how to start without sounding… View More

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"I'm a hooker" "No, you're a Dominatrix" "..?.."

It happens a lot. Someone politely asks me what I do for work, and I sit and look at them, trying to read them for what my response should be. Do I say hooker? Do I say escort? Dominatrix? Or do I not bother to field the whole sex work thing entirely and say something vague like admin or counseling? It's funny in a way, because when I say something like I'm an escort or a hooker some people around me are eager to correct me, to say… View More

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the dirty little secret

I think everyone has one of these. That little thing we don't want anyone to see, or hear, or know about. Psychological, physical, emotional... it could be Britney Spears on a hipster's ipod, or Gor in a feminist's bookshelf. For one lover, it was the thigh highs he stuck in the corner of his sock drawer... for another, it was the chest of toys and costumes he hid under his bed, meticulous about… View More

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Capiche?

I'm sitting in Soho at Sh's flat, snuggled into a bed that's an oasis of warmth in an otherwise cold room. It's sort of strange, really, as I haven't been here overnight since that last horrible night in January, before I flew back to California- he's… View More

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I'm watching you.

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Sex Workin' Sweetheart- or, yes, we have relationships

“So what do… View More

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Sex Positive? Not if Your Test Results are Positive.

"Sex positive community"? I'm calling you out. Something that has always bothered me is how the "sex positive community" has responded to… View More

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who can consent?

So I was just reading this article about a man with a low IQ who has been banned from having sexual relationships. And it makes me so… View More

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This Ain't Typhoid Mary, XXX

I had to think for a hot second about whether it made sense for me to write about the topic or porn stars escorting and… View More

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Breaking Barriers: Why I'm Just Not Angry at HIV+ Porn

Note: I talk in here about HIV/AIDs as it pertains mostly to white gay men, and white straight people. There's a lot more to be said on the topic of STIs pertaining to people of colour, particularly African… View More