Sitting here in the Berkeley hills, hanging out at my grandmother’s house, I feel frustrated. Frustrated because my application for my visa can’t mention what I do for work, or even that I’m employed- why? Because my work is socially stigmatized- it’s more socially acceptable for me to be unemployed than a sex worker. What the fuck. I’m always trying to explain how I view sex work like any other work, at least for myself. At… View More

"Patience is a virtue". I can't begin to describe how often I hear this and how much I fight against it, but I know it to be true. It's a virtue I haven't possessed and something I'm constantly struggling to learn. Patience. Currently I'm waiting on the visa decision for a tourist visa. I want to go back to London to visit my fiance, and due to being refused… View More

Calico, as usual, says things that not only turn me on immensely but also speak to me and inspire me to say more... this time, it was her post on deepthroating: "I love challenging sex, like deepthroating and… View More

Hello, I'm Kitty. It's been 3 weeks since my last session. But I finally had one, last Friday. I had been unsure, going into it- even driving in the car, I kept feeling like maybe I should turn back, maybe I wasn't ready. I've spent the last few weeks here celibate, and not doing much more than snuggle or kiss- even my dates have been cautiously planned to be public affairs that will prevent too much physical intimacy, in case I… View More

It's been a while since I've blogged consistently here. It's been a period of change, hardcore- personal development on speed, mostly, relationship processing and reprocessing, acclimating to the Bay Area and the ridiculousness to be… View More

I don't know if I wrote about this, but I got a tattoo before I left London. Nepetalactone, the active ingredient in catnip. Well, tomorrow I get serotonin and ether on myself. The main one, for me, is serotonin, a chemical I have struggled… View More

I've been reading this book called "Voluntary Madness" by Norah Vincent. It's a fascinating look into the mental illness industry- I say mental illness because mental health is generally pretty low on the list… View More

I've been thinking a lot about sex as work vs sex as play. I'd like to say it's an easy equation- when I'm having fun sex at home, the sex I have for work is more enjoyable, and I bring that energy back to my lovers, who send me back to work with a spring in my step that only copius, well-enjoyed orgasms can provide. But that's not always the case. Sometimes the fact I'm having fun sex with my lovers makes me feel more resentful… View More

When I wrote my blog on "What IS Safe, Anyway", I hadn't been actually assaulted in my off/on 5 years of various types of hands on sex work. Well, a couple of nights ago, I was. It's interesting to me that the first thing I want to do is reassure people I'm not badly hurt, that I'm ok, that I'm angry and poorer for it but I'll be… View More

"...everything else in life is that much easier" The above is from the Calligraphic Button Catalogue, which always has lovely badges that say anything I want to but with more wit and fewer words. I find that I tend to attract people who are on a Quest. A Quest for identity, a Quest for self, and what that self wants, who they are, what they need to thrive. Oftentimes, this Quest (I… View More