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jetsettling

So Sunday I flew out of London, out of the arms of my sleepy sweet boy and into the arms of my cuddly Care Bear girly. It had been a bit of a debacle, getting on the flight- they had overbooked it, so I had to wait for another, later flight- however, in exchange I got a return trip voucher wherever Virgin travels, AND upgraded to first class! Pretty snazzy. Travelling in first class made me think of how envious I was of those escorts who get flown to Europe for the weekend... le sigh, not the life for me as a sexy fat chica!

I'll be happy to settle on one side of the ocean at last. And I really hope it'll be on the London side with my boy and my amazing friends.

Still, while I'm in San Francisco I plan to keep busy and occupied with Burning Man preparation, packing up my room and, in two weeks, showing the boy why I love this city as well!

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Review: "Roulette"

 We also got "Roulette" at the same time as "Glamazons", reviewed in the previous post- and, well, we had to stop watching "Roulette" multiple times throughout to have some hot sex of our own.
If the boy's response to "Glamazons" was a shrug and a "meh", his response to "Roulette" was "woooooo!" "I liked it," he just said in a petulant voice as I teased him while writing this review, "I liked the variety, I liked how you weren't sure what was coming next." And that pretty much sums up this video.
With some hot gay punks going at it on a rooftop, a girl covering herself in milk in her kitchen, and a femme-initiated gangbang on a pool table, this was a porn video I would wank to. It was playful, it was real sex between people who liked having sex with each other, and it was deliciously queer in every sense. A hot mix of bodies and scenes, with some masturbation scenes to go with the couples and moresomes, made for a mix that quite rightfully earned this porn 2009 Feminist Porn Awards Most Diverse Film. Also, the soundtrack was rockin', which is likely why it ended up nominated in the AVN Awards for Best Music Soundtrack. 

So, while "Glamazons" didn't particularly stroke us the right way, "Roulette" was one we'll be taking out for sexyfuntimes. See for yourself which you like better at Good Vibrations, where you can get these and other videos as a DivX download, stream-to-own, or loads of other ways. You won't be getting porn of this quality down in Soho, so check it out online!
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Review: "Glamazons"

My boy is a big fan of zaftig women, particularly red-haired April Flores- so when I got "Glamazons" to review, I had a feeling he'd be ecstatic. And he was at first- but I can't say this was my favourite porn that I've gotten from Good Vibes.

April is lovely as always, but we were both taken aback that she was the only sexy fat girl on the dvd- for a premise that focuses on how hot curvy girls are, the lack of them was disappointing.

The story goes that "Glamazons" is the artistic rendition of the erotic fantasies of April and her husband, Carlos Batts- I quite liked one scene that had April seducing another woman while the two were sketched live by an artist, I thought that was interesting and pretty sexy. There were moments of April standing aside as a posse of strippers did some incredible tricks- something I admire but don't get off on, personally. And the music was truly dreadful- techno, which meant to watch it the sound had to go waaaay down low.

But god, April Flores is hot. I really like it when she's in vintage-y clothes or allowed to act a bit more than she was in "Glamazons"- one big reason I'm looking forward to checking out "Bordello" eventually, which seems like it'll have some hot queer April Flores awesomeness along with a bunch of other stars I adore.

I think if you're someone who likes a bit of BBW as a novelty in with what is otherwise pretty standard porn fare, you might really enjoy "Glamazons"- I think my boy and I *might* be a bit too queer for it!

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Boylesque- the start of something good.

I sort of despaired for burlesque in London, to be honest. I'm spoiled rotten in San Francisco, with the Living Dead Girlz and the Hubba Hubba Revue, with such themes as Aslyum, Summer Camp, O Canada!, and the vaguely hillbilly Creepshow Peepshow, where the lovely zombie Girlz coated me in fake blood for the first time. There was even a Jolly Old England one. Hubba Hubba always had amazing, weird, often politically tinted performances that were sexy, entertaining and insanely creative.

Then I came to London, and it was a lot of tits and glitter, fans and feathers, yawn. Yes, the girls were pretty, yes, they took off their clothes gracefully and well, but... it was boring. There was no mad mess like when my friend P-Raw squirted sillystring all over the stage and threw around enough glitter and fake money that the stagehand commented that it looked like a drag queen had exploded on stage. There were (and are) very few hot fat girls doing burlesque. I know some people who are doing interesting stuff, for sure, and am getting to know more, but I still felt a little turned off by most burlesque unless my friends were performing.

Then I found boylesque.

All sorts of boylesque.

Femme boys, butch boys, bears and twinks galore. Oh, it was delicious. And what I loved is that this boylesque thing did two things I liked very much- appropriated what had become a female sexual performance and made it their own, and submitted men to the gaze generally, which I am a huge fan of.

I originally got into this thing in part via Filament magazine, which I encourage any of my readers who like hot men shot for a female gaze to check out. They had a great article on boylesque- men who were taking burlesque tropes and turning them on their heads. And I was hooked.

Recently I went to see the final heat for the Male Tournament of Tease, which was quite fun. I went with H&J, friends of mine from waaaaay back in Massachusetts, and the boy. It was a mixed bag- one boy who had never performed before, poor dear, and three better performers that were hard to judge as to who was the best. There was a puppet strip which was fabulous and funny, there was a Kill Bill tribute, and there was a Billy Elliot themed performance. A couple of the Bears did a Human Centipede performance that was hilarious and sick. "Finally", I thought to myself, "this is what burlesque was like in SF, and what it used to be here- funny, weird, dark, sexy!"

But the boylesque performance that sticks with me, now and always, was Brokeback Disco.  Oh, Brokeback Disco, with your gay cowboys and your synchronized de-belting of each other..! How you managed to balance between masculine and camp, silly, sweet, and sexy, I'll never know. But god, do I love watching it. Never mind that the movement of these guys was just stunning- they flowed into and away from each other so incredibly gracefully! It was stunning. I remember clutching LA and TM and going "omgomgomg can we take them home please??" when I saw them perform at the Night of the Senses cabaret.

I cannot possibly capture the hotness, the tenderness, the amazingness that was Brokeback Disco. I will link here to their video and tell you only slightly forcefully to go watch it. It managed to be homoerotic without being crass, which can be a difficult balance sometimes, especially with this sort of performance. Major Suttle-Tease knows his shit.

Convinced you? Want to see some hot male action yourself? Well, Major Suttle-Tease, who is the guy behind Brokeback Disco and who works with other fabulous artists like the Groom (who did the Kill Bill performance) and Billy Thrilliot (also mentioned above) is doing a performance with his troupe, called, delightfully, "More or Lesque!" from the 28th of June to the 17th of July. It's just in Covent Garden, so you really have no excuse to not go. Hot men, being graceful and getting naked. What more could you want? Never mind that Suttle-Tease is just a lovely guy to meet anyway!

I'm going to make an effort to go, for sure, and I'll drag the boy along. Who knows, we were going to have a fourway date with my gentleman caller and TM, so perhaps we can do a show as well... ::grins::

Thank you, boylesque. You've given me hope again.

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Review: "Speakeasy"

So, I got to watch Crash Pad Volume 6, an excellent film, with the boy. 
Then, a few days later, I got to check out "Speakeasy", a porn I've been looking forward to for quite some time. I practically squeed when I opened my package from Good Vibes and it was in there with the other dvds! Now, I've been holding on to "Glamazons" and "Roulette" as well, but knew the boy would cry if I watched an April Flores porn without him, so gave my new gentleman caller the choice between queer DIY "Roulette" and porn noir "Speakeasy". As this gentleman is a waistcoat-and-tie sort of chap, I wasn't surprised he picked "Speakeasy", and I'm glad he did.
With Billy Castro as the investigator/hot glue sticking the storyline together and Lorelei Lee as the tempting blonde bombshell, this had a great mix of hot action and a great soundtrack. The sex was pretty rough, which I personally enjoy quite a bit- starting off with some face slapping and hand-on-the-neck fingering with Lorelei and the delicious Tomcat, who is in charge of several sites over at my old favourite Kink.com. Yum yum yum.
Jiz Lee gets tied up (first time I've seen them as femme-ish, actually, and I love that Jiz has hairy legs and a hairy cunt, one of my personal kinks), alone with bartenders tending to each other (Cyd makes another appearance- he is so fucking hot) and a great scene between Billy and Lorelei. Black and white mixed with colour separates the sex scenes from the storyline, which I quite liked, and there's an extra where you can watch pretty much all but the heavy sex bits, all in black and white, all with film grain, which was quite nice. And definitely get more  Billy, Lorelei and Jiz!
Watching this with my gentleman caller led to a great discussion on what's wrong with porn in the UK, why there's such a lack of queer porn here, who considers themselves consumers and what they'd like or not like about "Speakeasy" in particular and queer porn in general. We agreed that it would be good for pretty much anyone over here to watch- the D/s dynamics you see prove that you can do kink without fancy toys, and seeing trans bodies on screen is always a good start for showing people how to play with someone who is transitioning. It was really a great porn and one I look forward to watching again for sure. Grab "Speakeasy" over at Good Vibes- and remember, you can get it stream to own, iTunes ready download, or Divx download, so don't deny yourself this yumminess just cause you can't get a dvd at the local Harmony!
I think what I came away with here, watching two queer-directed, queer-starred porn films with a couple of cismen, is that EVERYONE can find the appeal in this kind of porn. There's a lot to be said for porn stars who love what they do, get to communicate what they enjoy, and then do it on screen for us to marvel at and wank to. No, it's not the same as every other porn you find at the corner shop, and no, it's not Anna Fucking Span with her women-directed-but-totally-for-men videos- and that's a *good thing*.
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Review: "Crash Pad Series, Volume 6"

Some people watch porn to get off- I do, too, but generally watching porn is a nice way to see some sexually stimulating material while snuggling up with someone cute. And something I've been lucky enough to enjoy is watching some queer porn with the boy, and someone else as yet unnamed on my blog (perhaps Scurvy? I dunno. He can pick something.)

Thanks to Blowfish, who responded quite quickly to my plea for queer porn to be sent to the UK, the boy and I got to watch "Crash Pad Series, Volume 6" together. He can be a bit unfocused, so sitting to watch a bunch of porn shorts was a bit hard for him. Plus the way I watch porn is similar to the way I watch any movie- I put it on and watch it from start to finish. Still, this had enough hotness that he was glued to the screen, especially during certain scenes!

"Crash Pad" is a collection I've seen before and enjoyed- the general plot being that there's a "no holes barred sex space" where dykes, queers, trans guys, femmes and butches can go to fuck like crazy- *if* they get the key. I like the variety you see in the series, and the fact the people you see seem genuinely into the play and each other. I also enjoy that you'll get a break in the fourth wall here and there- most of the people in "Crash Pad" aren't porn stars, so they'll glance at a camera here or almost kick the boom there. I love that, because it creates this amateur atmosphere that leads to you feeling you're at a play party watching people get it on, which is always lovely.

This particular "Crash Pad" had a great cast of characters doing some incredibly hot things. I loved the dynamic between Jiz Lee (pictured) and Dylan Ryan, where Dylan told Jiz that they could do ANYTHING but kiss. Watching the chemistry and the desire to make up but just... not... going... there! was super fun to watch. There was also a great scene involving the always hot Cyd Loverboy, with James as a reluctant gay jock boy, going at it with some gusto- watching them suck each others cocks was riveting! But the scene that made the boy and I happiest was the one that had Tina Horn as a naughty girl coming home to her Dominant, Casey Grey, for confessions and discipline... oh, wow. That scene had great spankings, some excellent fucking, and the sweetest ending I've seen in kinky porn. Really lovely.

So, do I recommend it? Definitely, no doubt. It doesn't seem to be out yet, but I'll let you know when I see it on Blowfish, because you'll not want to miss this. In the meantime, check out the Crash Pad's other dvds in the series, which are also well worth watching! And keep an eye on this blog- I've written in asking about doing a scene, so perhaps while I'm in California I'll get lucky and get to visit the Crash Pad myself... hope hope hope!

Stay tuned for the next review...

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Gay Shame

It's that time of year again, when thousands of baby dykes and twink homos gather together to drink themselves into a stupor in front of a parade of corporate sponsors who claim to be gay friendly as they have a float with some employee in badly done drag on it. Oh, and remember the beer will be overpriced, most of the people will be spectators who will gawk at you, and, in London, you have to keep your clothes on.

Yay!

Ok, so I sound bitter, and I am- gay pride has historically been shitty to trans people and queers, and they owe the existence OF gay pride to those very people they've ignored, displaced, and written out of gay history. Never mind that I'm against civil marriage for all, especially as it's quickly becoming one of the only ways to be able to immigrate and I think that's total bullshit. I totally agree- why should queer people fight to live lives like straight people, especially when that "normal" way of living oppresses many queer people? Why is it that white middle class men have become the voice of the gay movement? Why do we accept that like it's ok?

Gay Shame is a group that came about to fight all that bullshit, especially as it pertains to the consumerist, patriarchal crap that is often what Gay Pride has become. The SF branch, shown here photographed by Steve Rhodes, says this on their site: 


"We challenge not only the consumerism, complacency, and corporatization of gay people with power, but the ways in which a gay elite uses its newfound “success” to oppress less-privileged queers, homeless people, sex workers, people of color, and anyone else who might get in the way of gentrification. "


Fuck yes, right? Especially as London has been historically pretty shit at being respectful to trans people. 


I'll probably go. Hell, I might be organizing some kink pride group to march in the damn thing. But while it's a great costume party, please please remember as you're snogging some wasted stereotype on the pavement- there are countries that struggle to have a gay rights march, much less a pride parade. Spare a moment for them?

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Review: Posture Collar, Collar with Nipple Clamps, Silver Bondage Tape

I really couldn't wait to open the box from Passion to see what I got to review. I had bought a bunch of things from them (including the teddy bear paddle I now have and the Jennings gag you'll see in the bondage tape photos) and loved their customer service. On a whim I asked if I could review stuff for them... and got a box of the goodies in the title!

First up is this posture collar. I'm a huge fan of service submission, both giving and receiving, so a posture collar is a great thing to have around! I will say that this didn't fit my boy, which is why I'm wearing it here, so keep that in mind- it's better fitted to a feminine neck (the site says it fits 12" to 18", the boy's is 17", so I'd say expect 12"- 15" or so).

It is most definitely a posture collar- moving my neck was not an option. I wasn't sure about the big O ring at first but actually for a high protocol situation it's visually quite appealing. I might add a little bell in the middle or something for entertainment. It'd also be great for human ponies! No looking at your hooves in this baby.

The other thing I liked about it is that it was vegan! Hurray for options in kinky kit for vegan perverts. Because of that it doesn't have quite the same softness a leather one would, but it'd have to be made of leather then, so there you go. I think it'd be a good addition for any vegan submissive who likes tight constraining bondage and strict collars.

Second on my sampler list was the collar with nipple clamps. As my boy had just deliciously gotten his poor little pink nipples pierced through for my delectation, again this fell to me to model (I'm guessing you all won't mind). This was kind of sweet- again, it's the sort of thing I'd put on a service submissive to keep them alert as they did chores around the house, as the nipple clamps weren't TOO painful but just painful enough to make you aware they were there.

Again, this collar is also vegan, and I quite liked the fit of it- in addition it'd easily fit the boy's neck, which has been hard to put collars on. I quite like the chain, which is good and sturdy, not the B&Q crap you get on some such S&M equipment. The way the chains are just heavy enough to drape elegantly between my breasts was quite pretty I thought! I definitely foresee this getting a lot of use, whichever one of us is the bottom at any given time! Maybe during the next football bet the boy and I make... (slightly harder now that the US and the UK are both out of the World Cup...)

Finally, I got some silvery bondage tape. Now, I'm not historically a fan of bondage tape- I'm a cling film and duct tape sort of girl. But actually, when the boy was made into a sexy, silver-eyeshadowed dandy, tied and ready to be tortured... silver bondage tape was really nice, and while I had to use a fair amount to wrap him properly, it was quite pretty. I'm sure you'll agree...

Getting some bondage tape to review made me want to try playing with it again. It's really nice for some quick, simple arm bondage, or making into a gag or blindfold. And of course it can make a simple, quick outfit for a night out (though wrap it well or sweat will make it a rather exposing experience!). Plus, how hot does the boy look all tied up in it?

Incidentally this is also the Jennings gag I got from Passion, which matches the tape beautifully, don't you think?

My favourite out of these three things was definitely the collar with nipple clamps. Both functional and elegant, and vegan of all things, I foresee some filth coming out of playing with that collar. I guess the boy will have to Top more though, for a while, so his nipples can heal properly!

The best thing I found about Passion, though, is the variety of toys they have (teddy bear paddle! so hard to find!), at reasonable prices. Definitely, if you're in the UK, give them a looksee!

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if you want to watch a live sex show, look no further (nsfw photos)

Ok, so, generally I don't advertise people on my blog, but next week my friend Chloe is coming for a visit with her boyfriend, and they do these incredibly hot live sex shows. They're incredibly kinky, too, and it's just a pleasure to see how much Chloe enjoys being used by her Top.

I'm giving them a shoutout because Adultwork is a cunt and has shut down their profile temporarily, and they're a bit nervous about exposure. Well, you know how much I like exposing people (in sexy ways, anyway) and they're just such a lovely, real life couple that I felt I'd be amiss if I didn't mention them on here. And they're only here for 1 week! June 21st to 29th. So get in quick!

I can't even begin to tell you how envious I am of her body, but hey. ;) Not envious enough to try to force mine!

Now, to give a bit of background, these are folks I know via Kinky Salon in San Francisco. So you know how I'm all hot-crazy-American-slut? Yeah. They're like that too. Plus they're both incredible artists, she does burlesque, he plays and (I believe) composes music... They're both just brilliant. Highly recommended- and, you know, you'd be like a patron of the arts. Or something. While wanking to an incredibly hot couple doing a kinky sex show just for you. I'm tempted, personally! It might give the boy an education in Topping...

I'm copy and pasting the text of the ad they use on Craigslist (so, yes, please keep that in mind if the language seems a little playful and filthy): if this interests you, let me know and I'll forward your details along (I'm setting them up with a mobile number when they land on Monday).



Come over to our hotel room and see me get f*cked and treated like a c*ck sl*t while you watch. Watch me get on my knees and s*ck his yummy c*ck, get eagerly throat f*cked, display my spread p*ssy and a*ss for you, and then get f*cked hard in lots of different positions until he pulls out and makes me swallow his c*m or shoots it all over my pretty face and ti*ts ; ) I LOVE being a good little f*ck toy, being manhandled, getting spanked, having my hair pulled, worshiping his c*ck, being talked really dirty to, and being used HARD for your enjoyment. 
It's just like your favorite dirty video, but live in front of you!
You get to direct your own private show or just sit back and enjoy. We LOVE fantasies, fetishes, sl*t games, toys, k*nky role-play, verbal interaction, being directed, and I adore dressing up in naughty outfits and slu*ty high heels.  Stroke your c*ck and let me watch you! Being used as a f*ck toy in front of an attentive stranger is one of my biggest turn ons, so don't be shy... talk as dirty as you like to me, tell me what how you'd like me to s*ck his c*ck and what positions you wanna see me get f*cked in, and move around to get the best view of my mouth and p*ssy being used.
I'm a total c*m sl*t, and I'd LOVE to watch you c*m while he shoots his c*m in my mouth! ; )
We're a real couple and we put on a very intense and intimate show.
I'm a beautiful, submissive, playful, dark-haired petite vixen. 24 years old, 5' 7", 120 lbs. Model looks, exquisite gym toned body, beautiful face, gorgeous skin and eyes, and exceptionally sexy feet and long legs that I love to show off. 
He's extremely dominant, incredibly sexy, handsome, strong, confident, demanding, lean and muscular. 28 years old, 6", 170 lbs.

£140 hour incall
£165 hour outcall


~ Incall available at our upscale hotel in Mayfair ~

Our pics are recent and 100% us!
Read our reviews at the Erotic Review: http://www.theeroticreview.com/reviews/show.asp?id=130649
For an extra £35 you can also have my warm used panties that I'll take off and give you to enjoy and take home with you to remember our dirty adventure!

Couples most definitely welcome ; )

Please DO NOT contact us if you're looking for sex or physical interaction. This is ONLY a show.


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what would you do (trigger warning)

There's this show on ABC, called "What Would You Do?" where the idea is to see how people react to ethical choices. There's been a few now, like what would you do if service was refused to gay parents, or if a manager was sexually harassing a worker of his. The one that got to me was the situation of "would you help a battered woman"... and "would you help a provocatively dressed battered woman".

The difference between the reactions received, depending on *how she was dressed*- not his abusive behaviour, which stayed the same, but on her *clothing choices alone*- is just appalling. And disgusting.

To sum up for you- when the actress was dressed in jeans and a teeshirt, whether a Caucasian or African-American couple, people came to her aid, telling the boyfriend to back off and calling the police. When she was dressed in a low cut dress (or a dress at all, mind- one of the dresses was actually rather modest as well), however, no one did, even when he was physically abusive, nearby women whispering to themselves that maybe she was a prostitute.

Oh, of course! Because THEN violence in public is totally ok! If you're a sex worker, then abuse in public is par for the course, you can't expect people to get involved- I mean, it's none of their business, right?

"The reaction from the onlookers is both hopeful and discouraging.  In the scenarios where both the Caucasian “girlfriend” and the African-American “girlfriend” are dress conservatively, other diners appear concerned for the abused woman and offer to help her right away, ultimately confronting the abusive “boyfriend.” But, in the other two scenarios, both the Caucasian and African-American “girlfriends” who are dressed provocatively, do not get any assistance from the other diners in the restaurant.  In the video it is clear that the diners are bothered by what they are seeing, but their concern, surprisingly, is not for the safety of the “girlfriend,” but for the dignity of the couple.  Some diners even mention to the couple that they are embarrassing themselves." -from this Women's Center blog

I noticed in the comments that some women pointed out that, in an abusive situation, they might not have control over what they wear- which is a fair point as well, though it kind of smacks of "you should try to help me anyway, because I'm NOT a whore, I'm a good girl in a bad situation".  I also want to point out that the conversation between the actors, in the "provocative dress" situation, never said anything about her being a sex worker- rather, about whether what she was wearing was appropriate in public. Other people decided to interpret that as her being a hooker, and behaved accordingly.

Let me break this down for you, real slow.

No woman deserves to be abused. I don't care what they do in their personal life. I don't care how they're dressed. No woman deserves to be abused. EVER.

Got it?

I notice this a lot- no one really wants to talk about it, but there is an underlying attitude that some women are to be protected, and others are not. As part of the unprotected class, I want to point out this is EXACTLY why we need prostitution to be decriminalized or legalized- because no, we can't depend on other people to help us, and having some safety, however flawed and fucked up that can be from the police, is vital.

One woman felt so guilty about it afterwards, too. "I could've done more", she said. Well, sure. You could've. You saw the bruises. You saw him GRAB HER BY THE FUCKING HAIR. A middle aged couple of women asked to be moved, and said "she looks like she might be a prostitute, and he's her pimp" as if that justifies it. I could've thrown up I was so angry when one couple who witnessed this said "yeah, it would be better if that happened in private". Really. Because then it wouldn't offend your delicate sensibilities on how the world works, I guess. WTF.

Days like this I hate the world, I truly do.

I'm telling you, right now- she never deserves it.  And if you sit back and watch and do nothing, not even call 911? You are complacent in her abuse and should rot in hell.