Usually, when I'm on the phone having phone sex, I end up masturbating. I generally start out thinking "oh, god, whatever," rolling my eyes in the mirror at the fantasies that, to them, seem very taboo and unique and that, to me, are heterosexist propaganda studies. But more often than not, I get caught up in a piece of it, and end up rubbing one out, often with the attitude of "well, what else am I going to do?" Oftentimes I cum. I… View More

It happens a lot. Someone politely asks me what I do for work, and I sit and look at them, trying to read them for what my response should be. Do I say hooker? Do I say escort? Dominatrix? Or do I not bother to field the whole sex work thing entirely and say something vague like admin or counseling? It's funny in a way, because when I say something like I'm an escort or a hooker some people around me are eager to correct me, to say… View More

I haven't been clocking in for phone sex recently. Not entirely sure why it's lost my interest for the time being- possibly because I don't want to have to troll for clients when I can just meet people in person, which is much nicer. Maybe this afternoon I'll give it another shot. And it's about time I redye my hair. I like the reddish brown, so perhaps a bit more vivid this… View More

It's odd, but since I've been back from Poland I've been perhaps overly aware of personal space. Like a feral cat, I become curious about human contact but easily spooked- a lack of sexual contact or context has left me unsure how to handle cuddling with my lovers. Work is easier. First, I'm usually the Domme, so I get to decide how much contact and it's on my terms. There's an end point, so if I set an expectation high I don't have to… View More

"Zeal" is a positive term, I think. To have zeal for something means to have a passion, a fervor, a tireless devotion to a cause- a powerful enthusiasm. Yet, to be a "zealot" is a negative term- it goes from fervor to militant in the dictionary, from being driven to being a fanatic. I came to think about this when I was looking at a blog called the… View More

Apparently in the areas of comic books and literature (like there can't be crossover) I'm a nerd, and in computers, science and math, I'm only kinda a nerd. I can live with… View More

Calico, as usual, has spurred me into some thought about masochism, self-harm, and, of course, "Secretary", the movie that brought the two together. I was a self harmer. I have never been a masochist. To me, one could easily be a precursor to the other, and I'll explain that in a moment. But, call it my martyr complex- when I take pain in a kinky session, it's because I… View More

So I was tempted to find "Secret Diary of a Call Girl" rather off the mark, sensationalized, etc etc. So far, I've found it somewhat realistic, at least to the sort of experiences I've had. The men vary in attractiveness both physically and personality-wise, many of the johns are anxious and unsure, some are demanding and dangerous, some just don't click with you. A bad review means you may end up taking clients you aren't sure… View More

Thank the GODS, I'm back in the UK, comfy and safe in London with my lovers and my toy bag. It feels like the promised land after Krakow, a place with seedy sex shops, Catholics, and undercover gay men. I think the trip to Amsterdam I went on for a few days before coming back (in case I had to try to sneak in on the ferry- luckily I got my visa) was just what I needed. I was there for Pride, which was glorious in a lot of ways, though… View More

So, I've been silent on this blog for a while. This is, in part, because I've been trapped in Poland. I got denied entry to the UK, due to my volunteer work (which apparently counts the same as paid work, which means I was working illegally) and sent back to Krakow, where I've been cooling my heels and trying to get a visa. Being in a country where the women are still unable to get birth control or abortions regularly and… View More