Sometimes it doesn't take a genius to figure out your psyche.

But I'm in a place where I feel really... stable. Secure, for the first time in a long while. I know my friends will be here when I get back. And especially, I know my dear ponygrrl La, and her lovely boyfriend (and my friend) Gout will be there when I get back too. In a way, as much as it hurt, I'm kind of glad Mono and I split up, as it makes it a little easier to let go of California and what was looking like a dead end lifestyle there. A fun lifestyle, mind, but not one that was driving my passion anymore. And a life without passion isn't the life for me...

I'm really pleased that La and Gout are coming to see me off to the airport tomorrow. I'm spending the night alone, which is good as it minimizes the chances of me being a basketcase and scaring them off. This is the first time I've played with a couple and I've felt equally comfortable with them both, so it's very exciting and heady stuff for me- and what makes it especially nice is their support around my work, and my girlfriend in California. Is it true? Did I give up on finding a nonmonogamous relationship only to fall into one..? Well, stay tuned, and I'll let you know, I suppose!

I had an amazing session a couple weeks ago with a couple who really re-energized me when it comes to sex work. He was a man who needed strict discipline from the women around him... and he got it from us, in spades! She was a really sexy lady who didn't see how amazing she was, and seducing her and really imparting my admiration for her, as a sexual being and as a woman, made both of us feel giddy for a while afterwards. I'm hoping to get to see them again- they were a lot of fun!

Meanwhile some exciting things have been going on in the rest of my life- mainly that a lovely lady is doing a photodocumentary on my day to day life, which is really nifty and exciting and fun- she's letting me have some say in what we do together so I really feel like she's telling the story as I see it, and not with an agenda. Always a plus. Another thing is that I'll be presenting a lecture on "En:Forced Femme: the Peep Show Experience of Blogging as a Sex Worker". As I have information about it I'll keep people posted... I'm very excited and honoured to be asked, as well as being terrified! Never mind the essay I'm working on for a book about Bitchy Jones's Diary, which will similarly be about the experience of forced femininity both as client request and professional service on my part as it pertains to my appearance. Educated, that's me! ::grin::

Additionally there have been a few more documentaries in the works, and articles being worked on about polyamory, about sex work while in school, and other things... all pretty positive to be a part of. Gotta break down some of those misconceptions somehow, right?

While it's a pain to leave London while I'm just starting to get back into working, it gives me some time to fix up my website- I hope to have a brand new one, and new business cards, in the Spring. It's time for a fresh beginning, a more professional approach, advertising and good photos- I'm ready to take London by storm. Is London ready for me..?