Our City Hall Wedding Vows/Mission Statement

2016 can fuck right off but I did get married to a lovely talented femme and I did meet my amazing super supportive boyfriend so it’s not all bad.

I wanted to post the finalized words of our wedding vows. I mean, it’s kind of half vows, half mission statement, but they are important to us and we wanted to share them with the world. It’s been an awful year and we know that the worst is yet to come, but we can get through this, hand in hand and back to back.

Also thank you to Sadistic Stylist for carving the antifa arrows into my head, as well as for doing hair and makeup! ❤


K- This is not the end or climax of our lives, with all pursuant events being a falling action into stagnancy. Our marriage is a statement of our desire to center and honor femme labor and radical politics within our communities and our own personal lives. And this wedding is a reminder that we deserve nice things, too. *look around* Within fiscal responsibility of course.

J- There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness. Our partnership provides each of us an anchor that allows us to venture outward into an increasingly hostile world with the confidence of something solid at our backs, something unbreakable from without, but in need of delicate care from within. Like amorous cephalopods entangled in a dozen caresses at the bottom of a lightless ocean, so shall our strength and vulnerability fuse to help us weather an inhospitable world.

K- We will hold each other accountable to being our best possible selves, as activists, as figures of the community, as lovers. I will keep you from hogging the duvet, metaphorically and literally. This is what accountability looks like.

J- We will challenge and support each other’s dreams, like this: next week Kitty, at Madison Square Garden, I’m going to get you in the ring and I’m going to affirm the bejesus out of you.

K- We will use our experience and knowledge of one another to provide support and encouragement to our respective partners and friendships in times of trouble. Polyamory will come to us, speaking words of wisdom: this is the life we chose for ourselves.

J- We will grow, both apart and together, dedicating ourselves to evolution, education, and exploration. We will forge a safe container for change and struggle, stronger than any IKEA lockbox in the world.

K- We will love with our hands wide open. We vow to love and let go again and again, to have and not hold, to love consciously, conscientiously, concretely, constructively.

J- If one of us is lost, the other will account for her and advocate for their memory and spent labor to the community. If we die, may we die historic on the Fury Road… or maybe at the top of a ferris wheel. This is on the record now. That’s how I want you to bury me.

K- The world can change its rules, its laws, and its opinions, as frequently as it chooses, but we are not things. We vow to remain standing and fighting hand in hand or back to back, whatever is most conducive to the combat terrain at that given moment.

J- We commit to leaving this world, and each other, better than we found it. We do not know our road; we commit our lives to the way.

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